I have been thinking about this a lot lately.
A long time ago when I was pregnant we had some people make Frank and I dinner. I knew it was something I wouldn't like, but instead of hurting feelings I ate it- even though I knew I would get sick later. Seriously, I had to gag this stuff down. I pretended to like it. If I hadn't done this some feelings would have been terribly hurt. I am an honest person, I tell the truth. But telling this person exactly how I felt about this certain dish wasn't worth the awkwardness that would have followed as well as a pending friendship.
I was on the reverse side once- I made a dish that a person didn't like. They didn't try it and they told me how much they hated this dish. I was hurt. From then on, I vowed I would never do that. It would be my secret (and possibly Frank's) as to how much I didn't like it, but in front of people I would eat it. I didn't have to talk about the dish and say extravagant fibs like, "I loved that" or "I need the recipe". I didn't have to say anything at all, which allows the person to think what they want.
I don't think this is wrong, do you?
If I am making something over and over, the whole time thinking people like it, when they really don't. Then yes, I would want to be told in a nice, tactful way that perhaps I should try another dish or maybe people are just getting sick of the same thing.
There is an eloquent way of saying things without hurting feelings and I think people really need to know how to choose their words as to not offend.
Has this ever happened to anyone? Making something that someone (besides family) told you they absolutely hated? or Eating something that you didn't like so you didn't hurt feelings?
Saturday, December 19, 2009
Food Etiquette
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4 comments:
A long, long time ago when we were out here visiting family (I was like 12), my aunt made us this cheese soup that was disgusting. My brother and I tried to be good kids and eat it politely, but I think it was obvious that we hated it. So, my mom made this HUGE show about how good it was and made my aunt write down the recipe. I've always remembered that. I think if it's a one-time deal, you just force it down and live with it. It won't kill you. But, if someone's making you the same gross dish over and over again, maybe you say something?
I think people should just eat it and thank them for the dinner, but not go as extreme as ask for the recipe.
And I think it's very rude for people to say they "hate" something. I really just don't like that word because it sounds too harsh.
I grew up with some friends from my ward who I sat with at lunch time at school. They would always make comments about how gross my lunch looked. I thought it was so rude!
If I don't like something being served, I would try to make a good comment about something else they were serving that I truly did like, so as not to seem ungrateful. I think it's rude to just flat out tell someone you hate what they made for you. I would feel bad if someone told me that. When you're pregnant though, I think it's understandable that certain foods may make you sick, some of my favorite things made me sick when I was pregnant and it didn't mean that I didn't like the food. If I cooked something that was going to make a preggo person sick I would not be offended if they told me so at all, I would just chalk it up to crazy pregnancy hormones and really wouldn't be offended... especially if they thought they should choke it down and throw up later... so sad!
I agree with you. There's a difference between lying and saying "wow! I love this!" and just being gracious that someone made food for you and choking it down.
We went to some friends' house for dinner last summer, and instead of eating the stuff I didn't like, I just fed it to Bria. ha ha. That's the joy in having a child young enough to eat off your plate.
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